ok.. so.. there it goes.. this is his life now, this is how it has
become.. how it's gonna be..
sometimes you get through a life event that changes everything.. a
true milestone of your life.. a turning point by all meaning.. it's the kind of
experience that afterwards life is never the same.. ever
a life event that stays still on top of all bad events you might
have faced or face in your coming life, for nothing ever could be worse..
nothing can beat it.. it's devastating that no other situation can make you
hurt or feel pain..
the thing is.. it is.. really excruciating.. in every detail.. in
every single detail,,
it's a story written in pain, hurt, tears and grief,,
the details are a killer.. they are
the whole thing is a killer
not just an ordinary, casual or even a serial killer,,
it's the worst of its kind, a sick twisted psychopathic merciless
cold-blooded murderer who is enjoying what he's doing.. and oh he is capable of
doing much..
I've been through one of those most shocking-to-the-core
situations.. and it's having its toll on me,, life afterwards is not the same..
i myself, after is not the same..
yeah.. the whole thing is a killer.. and the details.. oh the
details.. they are a killer
----------------------------------
i wish to introduce my new friend,, well, not quite so far i gained
a new friend, he wasn't my choice.. or maybe he was idk
he just showed up and apparently got stuck in my path, or maybe I'm
the one following his path idk
let's call him D
so, D isn't a good friend, he's a nightmare actually, i don't like
him.. he's not fond of me as well, but we're somehow attached to each other
he keeps following me wherever i go, always by my side like..
always.. never leaves
he's always there.. never too far.. never even not close
it's like he's haunting me.. could he. be a ghost? a spirit and a
human being? a living one i mean? idk.. perhaps idk
i’ve always had the best typoe of friends, but not this one.. this
one is unlike them all.. he is the worst companion anyone could have.. he is
vile, cruel, evil.. he is evil
i just do know that he's causing me pain.. is he? no i don't think
so.. he just comes with the pain.. yeah.. that makes more sense, I'm all
pain-maxed-up already.. no place for more
so, that D, i don't talk to him, but he talks to me, i don't tell
him stuff, but he seems to know all about me, i don't push him to do anything,
good or bad.. but he is driving me insanely crazy towards self-damage
i hate you D
just can't get rid of you
it's not that easy,, there's a cost for everything after all.. and
i do know you'll refuse to go.. you’r not going to leave.. i know
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